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Before God was an Atheist…

Before I was a Christian, there pulsed within my blood an innate desire to scrutinize those who were…or at least people who had these “ridiculous” beliefs about some master of our universe…and what about other universes? Maybe there was a different God assigned to that one. I always gave credit to myself for being too smart to be conned into a rigid belief system that I assumed denied science and rational thought. Plus, I was happy thinking that if God gave me a mind to think, why would he punish me for using mine to deny his existence and embrace wordly concepts?

I was fond of philosophy, humor and cussing – which I confess, has yet to change now that I know God.

I thought that pursuing a religion or faith meant I had to give up the reality I had created for myself and the control I thought I had. Now, I can look back and see how God was working in my life, even when I never knew of his existence. Sometimes a flood of gratitude sweeps over my body and I’m hurled into a sea of tears. My world was like an Alice in Wonderland playground. My curiosity led to disaster, unanswered illusions, and complete chaos.

Now that I am a Christian, I struggle every day to die to myself. Those years of compounded beliefs that denied my savior come up to haunt me still. It’s a constant battle with myself to let go of the reigns and let God guide my path.
Just because I believe in God, doesn’t mean I don’t believe in science.

Just because I believe in God, doesn’t mean I don’t believe in this world.

Just because I believe in God, doesn’t mean I don’t believe in myself.

I believe in God who created science, conquered this world, and gave me breath to live out His plan.

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A Simple Truth

He is Greater than any fear

He is closer than anyone else near

He delights in you and wants your best

He watches over you while you rest

He is strong yet sweet

He knows no defeat

He provides warmth and comfort from the cold

He provides a shield in battle for the bold

He is beyond your reach, yet within your soul

He’s the other half of you that makes you whole

He is what guides you in moments of unknown

He is always there, you’re never alone

 

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I’m Free in Christ Alone

santa monica

I took an impromptu trip to Santa Monica this morning. The beach was beautiful, and so were the people who peppered the boardwalk. The crashing waves lured me with their roar. Although I was surrounded by beauty of the present moment, the truth remains that this world is not quite whole. Just like a youthful face succumbing to older age, our earth has wrinkles and blemishes and imperfections. Which leads me to the comfort of the freedom I find in Christ. Not freedom in the ocean breeze. Not freedom in the sand between my toes or the circumstances I’ve been blessed with, but by Jesus alone. In Him, I AM FREE.